Hair.
Hair.
I'm a hairy gal. It's thick, coarse, and black, and can be found on my pubic area, arms, legs, above my eyes, under my arms, and, it's looking like, my upper lip. Thanks a lot, Mom and Dad.
I've blogged before about having bush- something a lot of nude models don't have- and how there's no way in hell it's going anywhere. The hair on my arms stays put, as well- it's somehow not as offensive as the leg or pit hair I have. The eyebrows get tweezed, and I'm horrified about the upper lip- this appears to be a recent development, and I'm not sure how to deal with it.
If I wasn't a nude model, I would have stopped shaving my pits by now- I did my senior year of high school, and it was great. Most guys(and girls) labeled me a lesbian, but it was also the year when I had my first real relationship- with a guy.
But, I can't be hairy and feminine- I can feel feminine, but, to the rest of the world, I wouldn't be. And part of what I do depends on that. I'm pretty sure that my bush, by now, has caused a couple of photographers to pass by me- especially in regards to glamour photography and the like. But, you can't please everyone.
Unless I'm planning on doing hirsute fetish work, a la Furry Girl(who is awesome, by the way), and not much of anything else, the hair goes.
I guess that makes me a sell-out; maybe a true feminist would say, "fuck it," and throw out her lady Gillette. But at this point in my life, I don't think I'm able to.
Photography by Mike, taken in June, 2006.
I'm a hairy gal. It's thick, coarse, and black, and can be found on my pubic area, arms, legs, above my eyes, under my arms, and, it's looking like, my upper lip. Thanks a lot, Mom and Dad.
I've blogged before about having bush- something a lot of nude models don't have- and how there's no way in hell it's going anywhere. The hair on my arms stays put, as well- it's somehow not as offensive as the leg or pit hair I have. The eyebrows get tweezed, and I'm horrified about the upper lip- this appears to be a recent development, and I'm not sure how to deal with it.
If I wasn't a nude model, I would have stopped shaving my pits by now- I did my senior year of high school, and it was great. Most guys(and girls) labeled me a lesbian, but it was also the year when I had my first real relationship- with a guy.
But, I can't be hairy and feminine- I can feel feminine, but, to the rest of the world, I wouldn't be. And part of what I do depends on that. I'm pretty sure that my bush, by now, has caused a couple of photographers to pass by me- especially in regards to glamour photography and the like. But, you can't please everyone.
Unless I'm planning on doing hirsute fetish work, a la Furry Girl(who is awesome, by the way), and not much of anything else, the hair goes.
I guess that makes me a sell-out; maybe a true feminist would say, "fuck it," and throw out her lady Gillette. But at this point in my life, I don't think I'm able to.
22 Comments:
You do what makes you feel comfortable. I personally prefer the shaved look, but I don't come here to see you nude, I come here to see what you've said recently. The nudes are icing on the cake.
So the rest of the world, me included, can go hang. It's YOUR body.
The beauty (and sometimes the damned annoyance) of hair is that if you leave it alone for a while, it grows right back. If you try it once and don't like it, just give it a few weeks and you're back to square one. So, don't fret about your thick, raven bush.
You also talk about how you don't want to show any pink, and I agree with your reasons (especially for this blog topic). It makes sense that if you were to do anything to that patch of hair, you'd stop short of removing the hair covering your sex organs. That just leads to male objectification. So, I don't expect to see a bald Candy any time soon, and I don't have any problem with that.
Daniel and anon: you seem to be missing the point. This post isn't about pubic hair specifically. This is about body hair in general.
I'm also curious to know why shaving your pubic hair leads to male objectification.
I wasn't specifying pubic hair. You make mention that you wouldn't shave your underarms either if you could still get modeling jobs. And you talk of hair in other places.
In any event, to answer your question about shaving one's pubic hair and male objectification, I say it has to do with how males operate mentally. We are nearly always more visually-oriented than women. Seeing something gets a bigger reaction from us than hearing it or smelling it or tasting it. The more modified from the norm a woman's body is, the more the man's mind sees that body less as a human being and more as a thing that looks good. It's the same reason people, both men and women, like cars that look 'cool'. A car doesn't NEED to look cool to function, but when it's been tricked out with $50,000 dollars worth of modifications at West Coast Customs it's suddenly more than just a means of transportation, it's a thing of pride and joy. It's a personal statement of style.
Strictly speaking, and no offense intended, the female body IS an object, just as a plain, unadorned car is an object. But when those objects are primped and polished to within an inch of their life as with porn actresses and 'pimped rides', it's far easier to see them less for their intrinsic value as a person and a means of transportation respectively and more as Jenna Jameson, Hot Slut Extraordinaire and the Pussy Wagon, Hick Dream Truck.
Lastly, I'll say that I'm not sure how well my explanation holds up under scrutiny. It's an off-the-cuff thing written by someone who just woke up and has never given the issue much thought. So as always, my standard disclaimer applies: I could be wrong.
glad you don't cater to the whims of others... especially their ideas of beauty... a fashion that changes as often as those fashions designed to cover that beauty.
just found your blog, and I enjoy it very much.
thanks!
tbf: thank you.
daniel: dear jesus. I'm at a loss at how to respond to that one. I'll probably come back to it later, or maybe it deserves a post of its own. I'm really hoping for some back up here from fellow feminists who read my blog.
But I will say this: I am a thing of pride and joy to the people I care about.
Holy Mary Mother of God. I was going to comment about the funny ha-ha joys all we women face when dealing with hair, but then I read that hot chicks are like tricked out cars.
"The more modified from the norm a woman's body is, the more the man's mind sees that body less as a human being and more as a thing that looks good"
As much as the above comment terrifies me, it really only speaks to the particularly preference of the poster. We all want to think that our personal experience is some sort of universal truth. I can assure you that in my personal experience, the less a woman looks like a human being does NOT make her hotter among the men I know and love. In fact, the more "porn star" she becomes, the less attractrive they find her. I suppose to this poster, they're probably not real men. Maybe more like...um, non-douchebags.
All things are objects. Rock, human, bird poop--you name it. Objectification is a part of attraction. If you like your object of attraction to be objectified in a manner that resembles a plastic doll--go on with your bad self, but for the love of all that is holy, please refrain from speaking for men as a whole and using the "male brain" excuse as justification for some seriously fucked up preferences. The male brain is not wired toward misogyny, thank you very much. That's cultural conditioning. Didn't we all learn this shit in college?
It's the "man is more visual and likes X only" crap that drives me mad. Men are not stupid, robotic douchebags without the ability to think critically or independentally. Yes, we all have had Pam Anderson As The Only Form Of Hot shoved down our throats. Some of us, however, are actually able to discern our own, authentic preferences.
There is a freak for every flavor and a yahoo group for it. Men are no more prone to liking any one thing than blacks, women, Asians, etc.
But really, Candy, you should think about gettin' some rims for your ride. Trick that shit out. It'll make you hawt.
Candy, I did not mean to be offensive. And what I said doesn't excuse men being jerks to women. It's simply one possible explanation. You asked, I responded. I am truly sorry if my response was taken in an offensive way.
I wasn't offended, just astounded. The hood ornament hasn't been installed yet, but I'm working on it.
Hat's off to you, demandra.
Wait, wait...lemme just say one thing about the hair factor. The older you get, the more places it shows up where it's not supposed to (sadly, I too now have a 'stash. If you let it grow, you can give people rides).
I love hairy men, but hate it when hair shows up on me in places it "shouldn't" be. And oh, that's a discussion, ain't it? Why shouldn't it be there? Says who, and why?
But I love to see bush on women because when it's not there, it reminds me of when I was a child. I don't want to see erotic photos that remind me of children.
I would like to rebut Daniel, but I must admit I cannot because I admit I have never understood, not one bit, the whole "tricked out" mindset and trying to deconstruct it or criticize it is perfectly fruitless.
I WILL say that it is difficult to impart Daniel's larger biological meaning (men like hairless women, it's programmed in) to what is in fact a style that is but 10-15 years old. I mean, for fuck's sake, look at a Playboy from the 1970s. These girls have far more pubic hair than you do, Candy. In fact, most of these girls appear to have eschewed a simple trim. Has man's biology changed since 1970? Sorry, evolution doesn't work that fast unless you're a germ or microbe.
I'm not sure what a love of the hairy or the hairless really means in the larger scheme of things. I do rather distrust doing or liking something just because everyone else is doing so. Do I like hairy girls because they are unique today? Do I like them because to be hairy suggests that a girl thinks for herself? Both are possible, maybe a bit of both.
I will say I know I am pretty anticonvention. A part of me thinks that if I were writing this in the 1970s I would be campaigning for a smooth vulva. Perhaps....but I will say that I love the unique and bold, and today hairy certainly is that.
I think "artists" who reject a woman because she is hairy are missing the point. Is not the point of art to explore, push the boundaries, question convention? That's part of the reason why I was very fond of your menstruation website...only a bold artistic person would attempt such a thing, although I realize a lot of small people aren't really ready for such things.
I'm sure it would just fall under the heading of a "fetish" with me, but I've always found unshaven women to be immensely feminine and sensual. What could me MORE sensual than being so totally comfortable and in tune with one's body? I realize though that most of the rest of the world [the US anyway] dosen't share my view, so I totally understand how you feel about the matter.
BUT...Frida Kahlo seemed to do alright with men AND women...with the 'stace and the unibrow...Think about it!
Um, folks... Just curious, but what part of 'I could be wrong' eluded you? I never said I was absolutely right. I also said it probably wouldn't withstand any serious scrutiny because I'd just woken up when I posted it. Would you all have preferred I make a post composed of pretty lies that sound comforting but aren't actually a true reflection of my thoughts at the time?
You want another opinion of mine that reflects my true thoughts at this particular time? Men are idiots. Explaining idiots is always a tricky thing.
wow, quite the nutritious food for thought here.
don't take it so personal, daniel... you're just standing in for the lowest common denominator here -- objectified as the douchebag, so to speak, lol.
as for objectification, each will do so according to their tastes. i keep a blog of nudes of my own, and so get the gamut of reactions from viewers, many of them objectifying, to be sure.
eye of the beholder, and all that rot surely applies.
and with regard to hair vs. none, I always find pubic hair to be very erotic... mind you, a clear view of the vulva is nice, but the hairless look just always seems like something's missing (I can't even begin to associate it with childlike genitals -- not wired that way)... in my own pics, it's often the exposure of pubic hair more than the cock that i find erotic...
and candy's bush strikes the same chord, at least for me... it's very sexy, and while she's a lovely woman, something would be lost in her nudes without it.
Why is it in this culture bodyhair is so offensive. As a guy, personly i think body hair is beautiful and femmin. Besides theres nothing more disturbing then scratchy stuble, on men or women. Plus we would have to blow so much on razors.
I love the bush. And the great part is that if you don't like the landing strip (practically required to get into today's bikinis) or completely bare, it will grow back quickly.
Body hair is definitely associated with feminism -- but it is usually associated with hair on the lower legs and under the arms. I don't find it a turn off either way.
I wonder also if your tattoos might be an impediment to getting work because they are permanent and would have to be photoshopped out by the photographer.
b- the part about the tattoos- spot on. I've had photographers email me and write, "It's too bad about those tattoos."
the best thing i have ever heard said about hairless pussies
"the brazilian is the mullet of the 21st century." It is funny because now it doesn't seem naughty to be shaved @ all, hair has become more subversive & I like it.
i got my 'stache done with electrolysis. love my latin looks, hate my latin mustache.
it's gone now and i like it that way, waxing it just keeps coming back and back and back.
I can relate to 'mnmjr.'.
Personally, I find naturalness more appealing than gloss. Photoshopped models do not turn me on. If it were up to me, I would tell you to let all kinds of hair grow everywhere - as long as you are comfortable with it (assuming other people's opinions don't make one uncomfortable).
I understand what some poster said about being 'tricked out' - but that kind of attraction to the glossy shine is extremely unsatisfying.
You have a right to be you, Candy. It's better to be liked by the right (right for you/me) people for the right reasons than to be eye-catching to others.
PS: The men who prefer aesthetized women will similarly be forced to 'enhace' themselves with looks, knowledge or money. The pressure they exert gets exerted back on them.
PPS: I think you're a beautiful person, in your way. (I'm not going to make an inside-outside distinction).
what's funny is that i can leave my legs hairy for weeks and not care. i don't shave my bush but i trim it... and i tidy the bikini area where it's straggly...
but my mustache and my armpit hair drive me crazy. crazy.
and legs with braidable hair won't bother me at all. funny how we're all a bit quirky with this personal grooming stuff.
I love it hairy, it's the best
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