Saturday, June 03, 2006

SeeCandyBleed and the Single Girl.

Before I begin, let me stress that this is not, in any way, shape or form, a personal ad. I do not want to sleep with you. And, yes, this is from my other website. So what?

It looks as if I'm going to be entering singledom again. I'm not going to go over details as to why my relationship came to a close, because I'd prefer to keep my love life personal.

I'm certainly not planning on finding someone else for a good long time, or even having a friends-with-benefits sort of thing. I'm perfectly happy to be celibate for a while.

However, the distant future of my romantic/sex life is quite the puzzle. How exactly does one tell a potential mate that not only are you a nude model, but you run a menstruation porn/art site? That you post naked pictures of yourself on the internet? That, in essence, you take your clothes off for money?

I'm sure I have both female and male admirers, and there are those in my offline life who think what I'm doing is, at the very least, interesting- but that doesn't mean that any of those people would be willing the accept that in a mate, much less embrace it.

There's no way in hell I'm going to stop doing what I do- but it certainly puts me in a quandary concerning future partners.


Anonymous said...

i'm sure lots of people are willing to accept that in a mate. i would.

12:38 PM  
Anonymous said...

One word, Honesty.

You might not want to start the conversation by blurting it all out, but if you sense a dating feel coming on just sit down and tell them. Obviously there is nothing wrong with what you do, but there are going to be plenty of people drawn to it or repulsed by it. In a way it is no different than any other trait, like being of one political party or another.

We are a couple in multiple lifestyles. You think it is tough telling someone that you model, try telling a potential date that you could never be monogamous or that occasionally you like to be slapped and spit on during sex. It is generally better to get the potential "deal breakers" out there early, rather than have heart break later.

R & J

1:22 PM  
AmHistorian said...

Is really plain and simple. If someone loves you, they will love you without hesitation or qualification, unconditionally. I know that sounds somewhat utopian, but trust me when I say that it is possible and wonderful.

5:30 PM  
Brendan said...

I think about this issue a lot. There are so many people who have created a 'Net persona these days. Whether it's for something political, visual, musical, or sexual. Things you do will really follow you around.

There are so many women (and probably a lot of guys) who have created web pages that are WAY more sexual than Candy; and they have basically done it at the behest of some boyfriend or husband. But what happens if and when the relationship ends? What do they say to a potential new mate? "Ummmm, I might have been in a gangbang a few times and there are probably about 10,000 people who saved the photos." I don't think that's going to go over well with someone who has a conservative background.

However, if you are circulating in groups of highly artistic and politically progressive people, things like that are not deal breakers. And "See Candy Bleed" is at heart progressive and not "Net Ho'" stuff. So, as long as you aren't trying to hook up with a Wall Street banker or someone from the Family Research Council, it will go pretty well. You just basically tell them that you are involved in making edgy artistic statements.

11:33 PM  

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